Throughout my life I have found very few things that I am unable to do. I am sure that all of you are under the impression that I am quite perfect, unable to do wrong. You are very close to right, but there are a couple items that have been discovered that show that I am still human, just like everyone else. I was shocked the first time I couldn’t do something, and brooded over it for weeks, so that I got frown lines at the side of my mouth. Then I realized that the reason I couldn’t do it was because I was doing it wrong. That explained it! So I hurried and did it right and I realized this important lesson:
IF YOU CANT DO SOMETHING IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. WHEN YOU DO IT RIGHT YOU WILL BE DOING IT RIGHT.
Remember that everybody. It will help you out in your life.
But I have also realized that there are some things that people really CAN’T do because of the way that their body or mind is built. Most of the things that I really can’t do have to do with my mind.
One of the things that I discovered recently is that I can’t clean the house and listen to a radio theater production at the same time. Actually I didn’t realize this, it was my mom that did. I thought that I was cleaning, but apparently I was staring into space with my mouth hanging open. She pointed this out, I saw that she was right, so I began cleaning again. Two seconds later her voice again penetrated the happy fog that surrounded my mind, telling me that I was stopped. I looked. She was right. How silly. I wouldn’t stop this time.
Two seconds later it happened again. And again. And again. Once the radio theater production was over I could clean just fine. This bugs me.
Another thing I apparently can’t do is act normally when washing dishes. Mom looked at me when I was recently washing dishes, and my face had an incredibly delighted look upon it, as if washing the dishes was the best thing that had ever happened to me, which it is not. She burst into laughter, and as she did, I guess my face switched from incredibly delighted to deepest anger with a rapidity that was startling. She laughed for a straight half hour without stopping. As she was subsiding she looked at me again. I thought that I was singing silently, but she said that I was sticking out my tongue in all directions and making grotesque faces. This caused another burst of mirth on her part, which I feel was quite uncalled for. Silly mom. It wasn’t THAT funny.
IF YOU CANT DO SOMETHING IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG. WHEN YOU DO IT RIGHT YOU WILL BE DOING IT RIGHT.
Remember that everybody. It will help you out in your life.
But I have also realized that there are some things that people really CAN’T do because of the way that their body or mind is built. Most of the things that I really can’t do have to do with my mind.
One of the things that I discovered recently is that I can’t clean the house and listen to a radio theater production at the same time. Actually I didn’t realize this, it was my mom that did. I thought that I was cleaning, but apparently I was staring into space with my mouth hanging open. She pointed this out, I saw that she was right, so I began cleaning again. Two seconds later her voice again penetrated the happy fog that surrounded my mind, telling me that I was stopped. I looked. She was right. How silly. I wouldn’t stop this time.
Two seconds later it happened again. And again. And again. Once the radio theater production was over I could clean just fine. This bugs me.
Another thing I apparently can’t do is act normally when washing dishes. Mom looked at me when I was recently washing dishes, and my face had an incredibly delighted look upon it, as if washing the dishes was the best thing that had ever happened to me, which it is not. She burst into laughter, and as she did, I guess my face switched from incredibly delighted to deepest anger with a rapidity that was startling. She laughed for a straight half hour without stopping. As she was subsiding she looked at me again. I thought that I was singing silently, but she said that I was sticking out my tongue in all directions and making grotesque faces. This caused another burst of mirth on her part, which I feel was quite uncalled for. Silly mom. It wasn’t THAT funny.
1 comment:
Dear Aliysa,
I LOVE YOU!!! I just spent over half an hour catching up on your blog because I had forgotten to save the link. You are hilarious! My life was not fully complete without reading this and now I am living in bliss again. Keep posting I love reading these.
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